Kingdom Fall: A Bad Boy Billionaire Romance (Kingdom Come Book 2) by Terri E. Laine

Author:Terri E. Laine [Laine, Terri E.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-10-06T16:00:00+00:00

Fifteen

Connor

Allowing her to believe I would stay wasn’t a lie—or was it? I’d promised her and myself no lies, even by omission. But how could I risk falling asleep and attacking her as I fought off nightmares? When her breathing slowed, I made an attempt to disengage myself from her hold. I smiled when she only burrowed deeper into my chest.

“A chuisle mo chroí,” I whispered.

“Hmm,” she said sleepily.

I repeated it slowly, sounding out the Irish Gaelic phrase—ah coo-shil mu cree.

She murmured in her sleep. Knowing her, she was trying to ask me what it meant. I’d heard my mother say it once. I thought she’d said it to my father. When I asked her what it meant, she told me it meant my pulse, my heart, but it also meant you’re my everything. It fit how I felt about Lizzy, more than the word love, which I had yet to define.

I closed my eyes for a second, and when I opened them, fear had me in its clutches much the same way I held Lizzy by her shoulders. Though I feared I might have shaken her in my sleep, she was speaking to me, low and soft.

“I’m here,” she repeated. “It’s me.”

I let go as fast as if I’d burned myself. “Sorry.”

“No,” she demanded. “It’s fine. I’m fine. You’re here with me. We’re fine.”

Though I appreciated her words of encouragement, I felt sick. I didn’t want the past to taint my present with her. I sat up and rested my arms on my knees and my face in my hands, trying to scrub away the dream.

She moved to sit next to me and rubbed circles on my back with her palm.

Her comfort was too much. I stood. “This isn’t going to work.”

“What?”

I couldn’t look back at her for fear I’d give in to desire. “I’ll get your bag so you can get dressed.”

“Striker, wait?”

I didn’t. I rushed out as though I walked over hot coals. When I reached her bag, I waited a second as the phrase Don’t let fear destroy your life played in my head. The problem was. I had no choice. I was too fucked up. Being a dominant worked for me. I set the rules so I could sate my baser needs and leave. The word boyfriend or husband could never define me. It would mean I had to stay, and that wasn’t an option.

When I brought the bag back, she’d wrapped herself in a sheet and held out a hand.

“Thank you, Connor,” she said with a frosty bite.

I nodded and left. I sat in my chair and closed my eyes. I kept them that way when I heard her return. She made no attempt to speak to me, though I couldn’t blame her. It was my fault for agreeing to try something I knew wasn’t possible. She thought I could always be gentle. I knew differently. I knew what my hands were capable of.

Grant came out of the cockpit. “I would have offered sooner, but you guys were in the back.

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